sandr029

Car dealerships are a breed of their own in British architecture. I don't know whether there are dedicated building regulations for them, or quite how this genus of the species 'bad architecture' has developed in the way it has. They always look uniquely clipped together and temporary. It is as if car dealership design has developed on Easter Island: you can see where it came from, but at some point it stopped having any relationship with the rest of the construction industry. The constructional logic is derived from the sign - a structure with clipped-on symbols. Like all buildings like this, the cladding system is a law unto itself with strangely small panels contrasting with the over large and annoyingly reflective glazing. Look at the picture above: in its vertical expression, there is no hierarchy between glazing member, structural column, downpipe and advertising hoarding. This is unreal architecture, the same wherever it appears. It embodies nothing about BMW, nothin...

THIS BUILDING IS THE DEVIL, IT IS THE ENEMY, IT IS SO UNREMITTINGLY FUCKING GRIM THAT IT'S HARD TO EVEN LOOK AT THE PICTURE WITHOUT IT DAMAGING YOU. IT'S A COMBINATION OF BOTCHED CURTAIN WALLING, WINDOWS THAT DON'T FIT THE HOLES THEY'RE IN, ALL TOPPED OFF WITH A HAT THAT LOOKS LIKE AN ARMY SENTRY POST IN WEST BELFAST. JUST NEEDS A BIG FUCKING GUN TURRET ON TOP AND IT WOULD FIT RIGHT IN. SMALL OBSERVATION - I CAN HONESTLY SAY THAT I'VE NEVER SEEN EFFLORESCENCE ON THE MORTAR BETWEEN TERRACOTTA BOLLOCKING TILES. THIS BUILDING WAS SHORTLISTED FOR A FUCKING AWARD . IT COULD HAVE WALKED AWAY WITH 'BEST RSL-LED LARGE DEVELOPMENT' AT THE AFFORDABLE HOME OWNERSHIP AWARDS. ADMITTEDLY THAT IS NOT A PARTICULARLY COMPETITIVE CONTEXT, BUT FOR FUCK'S SAKE. THE REF MUST HAVE BEEN BLIND. APPARENTLY 'THE CONCEPT DEVELOPMENT SOLUTIONS TEAM IS RECOGNISED THROUGHOUT THE MIDLANDS FOR ITS EXPERTISE AND INNOVATION.' EVERYONE IN THE FUCKING MIDLANDS SHOULD GET OUT MORE.

Urban design in Britain must be about the worst in the civilised world. This masterplan shows why, with a variety of autumnal shades used to demonstrate how little clue we have about making real streets, real neighbourhoods or real connections with the fabric of the city. Look at the perimeter, to start with. The site is almost entirely removed from any engagement with its context by lines of trees. Look at the shared surfaces at the road junctions - a shitty brown colour picks out the spaces that no kids will play on (still too dangerous) but that will cause maximum annoyance to motorists. Look at the sub-Brookside close in the bottom left. This is town planning done at the developer's behes t, with no regard to what makes a town work. There's no real public space, just the semi-private kind masquerading. Look at the small blue spots - these denote what the architect refers to as  'garden squares'. They look more like car parks to me. Urban planning in this country...

I'm torn over this one. I think the architect tried hard. It's just an awful result. You can see what they were trying to do - some very small clerestoreys and banded brickword probably made them feel a bit like Jim Stirling. But it just ends up looking like a faux-postmodern lock up. I congratulate the photographer on waiting for sunny weather, but it doesn't make much difference, does it?

Well, well, well. Archial appears to read our blog . The BBC has covered its proposal for a 'sustainable' house made of Hempcrete (as if it's the first time anyone had ever thought of it). But Auntie said that the proposal was from the University of Bath, rather than this blog's favourite shit architect. We, dear reader, know different. The image that the BBC ran (the second from the top) is a little less architect-ed up, but it's the same old shit. Archial/Bath Uni couldn't even be bothered to change the angle of the visualisation. The thing I'm sure about is that they saw our comments about how bad the render of the render looked, and took the Tipp-ex to it. Now we have a pristine, white 1980s executive home rather than a slightly grey one. Thing I'm wondering is, which one came first? Did they add the timber adornments to charm the design press, or did they remove them because the BBC wouldn't understand the architectural sophistication of the tim...

With many thanks to one keen-to-be-anonymous reader, I bring you this commercial development by an architecture practice with a truly embarassing name. Who 's have thought that the word/number hybrid Cre8 (are there 8 of them?) would find its way into architecture? According to Google, Cre8 has already been used by a 'concept design and marketing' company, a photography agency and an organisation that ' exists to provide kids and teenagers with an opportunity to develop creative arts skills in a Christian environment'. Even so, these guys felt that there was still mileage in the brand. As for the building, it's a combination of corporate cityscape style (see most of central Leeds) with a smoked glass 'feature'. The corner's a great lesson to us all. When you really can't decide to do a curve or a sharp corner, do both! My correspondent on this one coined a beautiful phrase to describe the checkerboard facade treatment and gives an eye witness...